My Rules!!

We do not want to be making decisions all the time, do we? It's highly pertinent to decide where I will not invest any time in making a decision so that energy is invested only when it is important to make a decision.

Thiis is where rules come to help. Rules are decisions which have been taken and are sacrosanct, yes, they are sacrosanct. They cannot be violated at any cost. Rules help you avoid the tussle in your mind all the time about things which should not be debated over for your life to go smoothly.

I need to decide these rules for myself. I am making a start today and will add as I realise more things that are sacrosanct for me:- Some rules for smooth functioning of my life, I will not debate about them with myself any more, they are SACROSANCT

 Exercise for at least for 40 minutes once 24 hours, even when it’s raining, you have a meeting, no matter how hectic the schedule, HEALTH is a value I live for. This may mean 2 in the afternoon (find shade) or 3 in the morning, this rule will not be broken, unless I am bedridden or my limbs are not working. I will ideally exercise either in the beginning or the end of the day or any other hour. Not exercising is ruled out.

 I will always be grateful. This may sound trivial, but it is very important. Even if I look at my life right now, I am sitting in my bed with a laptop and writing in my blog and I have extremely intelligent people for company all around me. I have no reason for despair. Life is beautiful and if I make the right choices in consonance with my purpose, it will only become better. Yes, I am happy and grateful to luck or the creator of my destiny. Whatever is meant for me will come to me.

 I will always seek the company of great people. If I like someone, I will find time to spend time with them and form relationships. Relationships are all that matter in this world. Anything can be done with great people. I will reach out and make friends with great people because I think they are great. I will not hesitate in reaching out and doing whatever it takes to stay in touch with these people. On the other hand, I will stay away from counterfeit people.

 I will be an instrument for change and progress. If something is not right, I will raise my voice and do whatever it takes to change it. I will break the status quo if it does not help lives and stalls progress. I do not care if no body else has the guts. I will do it.

 I will be answerable only to myself for my actions. I do not know if God exists. I really don’t. Given this situation, I will be answerable only to myself for my actions and their consequences.

 I will either have brunch or luchfast only. I will not have both breakfast and lunch. It will be a combined meal. This will be the heaviest meal of the day.

More rules will follow.

I repeat. These are not debatable.

group behaviour!!

We spend so much time in informal groups, in offices, in canteens, we just land up either with random people or even with our selected set of people.

How does a group behave. Unless and until there is a set agenda for discussion, the discussion lands in all directions and not much is gained out of time spent. My opinion is groups meetings ouught to have a purpose to be successful. The discussions need to be focussed and it should be time well spent.

I do not generally FREAK OUT in groups. If it's an informal meeting, I would like it to be a one-on-one meeting or outing. If we are going out, i want to go with a selected set of people I like and admire.

I like intelligent company, be it people or books and I love intimacy and depth.

I hate to lose!!!

I just hate to lose. I play to win, I do not play for the sake on fun because if i lose, it hurts.

I avoid games like volleyball where I am not good at and I cannot even generate a sufficient level of interest to improve on it. Whenever I have tried it, the ball goes all sides but over the net. I HATE TO BE ON TEAMS I CANNOT MAKE A SIGNIFICANT CONTRIBUTION TO.

So, I do not play volleyball.

Also, I value personal excellence. I like to be a star in indiviual games and even when I am a part of the team. I do not feel really happy when my teams wins and I did not contribute much to the victory. I feel satisfaction only when I contribute, I must deserve it. I WANT TO KNOW THAT I MADE IT HAPPEN.

So, this comes to table tennis. I love TT. Very few peple can beat me on it and I hate losing even a single game. I get mad.

I do not know it's good or bad, but

I play to win;

In a team game, I must be able to contribute significantly to the cause of the team, that is, to win

I will not play games where I do not win in a spectacular fashion. I just won't.

The paradox of choice!

The title of this post is the title of one of the most insighful books i have read and still reading. I love it.

I share some of the insights here.

Some people are maximisers and some are satisficers. I am talking from the population of people who have some standards for their lives. Now, satisficers are happy with "good enough" choices and maximisers seek to maximise everything. This is where the problem is. Every time they make a decision, they think of all the better alternatives they have had to give up.

For example, a maximiser buys a motorbike after much search. Now that he has the motorbike, there is a possibility of "postpurchase regret" Maximers cannot escape this because they will keep thinking about all the alternatives that he has given up and which could have been better.

It's not that satisficers do not have standards. They have standards but once they make a decision, they are happy with their decision which enables them to enjoy their decisions. They do not have to keep thinking about options they have left out.

There is nothing called a perfect world. A perfect world is a hypothetical reality where we do not have to make trade offs and get everything we want. This is an imaginary situation.

We all want to have choices. But what do these choices do to us? Does it help out lives? Does it help the way we make decisions?

unfortunately, the more choices we have, the more frustrated we are. We cannot decide what is good for us. I mean, think of buying a car. Which car should you purchase? Which category? Which design? Which company? Lets sa you boil down to a company. Maruti.

Now Maruti zen, versa, 800, Baleno, SX4, Lx, Px or Gx???? Ofcourse, I have not covered the entire range here. The opportunity costs of making one decision over all the others!!! Think about the opportunity costs of marriage!!!!

Counterfactual thinking has been the reason for the growth of the human society. If only we did not think about something that does not exist and could be a possibility, how would we eveolve?? However, it is also the reason for regrets, both anticipative regrets and buyer's remorse.

More and more choices do not quite serve us all the time. We would ideally want to be left alone and not look at opportunity costs at all. e can help ourselves by being satisficers. The problem in keeping options open is that we are never quite done with the decision.

People do things which they do not have reasons for. "Why" does not always precede reality. Choice is supposed to benefit us, isn't it? But does it?

The opportunity costs of one choice over another present the paradox of choice!!

cheers

most painful phrases in english!!!

simply put, these phrases should never be used. They always talk about something that did not happen because of a misjudgement, a mistake or whatever.

NEVER USE THEM. They are

might have
should have
could have
would have

I hate them all

Happy Birthday Meetu!

It’s good to have a sister. I can say it because I have one. And I do not want any more.

Well, it’s like this. We grew up together knowing each other and living with each other’s good and bad times. We used to fight a lot over small things when we were little children, which I am sure we are not anymore.

We are 2 different personalities; I have just been more self oriented. I have loved growing up with her, although no “boy” benefits have been provided to me by our parents. She has had equal opportunities or at least I think so. So, our parents are “equal opportunity parents”.

I know she loves me and has always cared more for me than the other way round. I have been a rebel for at leas one decade now and she has had to bear the brunt of this along with my parents. I went through a very bad stage last year, where things got awful for the entire family and she went through a rough period during that time.

She is not materialistic at all which is great. Her values are intact and not fragile. She would not take risks too frequently. She is one of the most simple and unadulterated people you will com along, trust me.

We have come a long way being jugnu-meetu! There is a long way to go still. I do not know and cannot say what life will be like, although we will do our best.

It has been great to have her as my sister, any alternative choice would not make sense to me, and I would not opt for it.

I wish you achieve professional success and get more out of every single day life has to offer!! Happy birthday meetu!

unfulfilled temptations!!!

you know what. one thing is clear. We al have fantasies, these are distinct desires of ours which we see during the dreams that we consciously see during the day and also during night, although I do not remember any.

However, the thing about some of these fantasies is that they will not be fulfilled. Marketers know this dilemma, they are insightful people and they target some advertisement messages towards these desires of ours. They are not latent, they are extremely obvious and clear, at least to my mind.

The temptations that we cannot afford to ignore and the temptations that will never be fulfilled because it is morally/conscientiously/socially/whatever wrong to fulfill them.

You will have to frame it properly and call it something that nobody can challenge. If the question is moral, the answer has got to be morally right as well, something like religious compulsions!!!!

If you do not understand all this, I do not blame you at all. If there is an answer , it is within you than outside you