Good bye 2010! Welcome 2011

Today is the last day of a very dramatic year. An important year in the history of my life. It was tough not having a job for many months in the beginning of the year. It was challenging trying to start afresh as a beginner in advertising and letting go of all I had done in the last 5 years.

It wasn't or ain't easy quite.

It was quite a satisfying experience writing my first book. "Snippets of Life from an Eccentric" will always be my first book irrespective of how many books I write. It will always be close and special to me. I tried being a stand up comic recently. I screwed up so badly. But that's okay.

Things take their own time. Life is it's own precious journey and there is always destiny walking by your side and it will decide what's going to happen and when it will happen. That said, I have achieved many important goals that I had 10 years back. Somehow it just took much longer. However, I have just reached the right track.

Enough nonsense! This bastard hit my car in the morning, I mean on the last day of the year! So, shall I cry? Would that be of any help? Chuck it! I am feeling dazed.

I look forward to 2011. I know how badly I do. There is so much I want to achieve. There is so much I want to be.

• A successful writer
• A crazy, loud, hilarious stand up comic
• A super advertising pro
• A transformational motivational speaker
• A marathon runner

Yeah right!Lots of work.

Happy 2011. Happiness is everything.

buy me!

been long looking for her, i wonder where is she; i am on sale, the price is love, buy me

Goals 2011!

The new year is here and it's time to push life higher, forward!
Here is my goal list 2011.

1. Move to the next level at JWT. Move to Planning/Research!!!! AM is not for me. Professional
2. Find her. Personal
3. Meet at least 50 new exciting, passionate, full of life people. Social
4. Create love and happiness every moment. Community
5. Write 2 books and look for speaking opportunities. Turnaround

6. Run the half marathon. 21 kilometers. Be more

7. Perform as many times as possible as a stand up comic. Be More

8. Get the hell out of India- sanity's sake!

Why do I exist? To create happiness.

The purpose of my life is to enjoy myself by doing things I love to do
Be happy by focusing on my blessings;
Create happiness, enthusiasm love and pride;
and do it today for there is no yesterday and there is no tomorrow.



My Values:
Health Passion Freedom Excellence Willingness to die for my purpose

3 Commandments by Amar:-

1. Be yourself. Do what you love. Express who you are.

2. Carry an attitude of gratitude. Smile Every Second. You are alive!
3. Live fearlessly. Fear NOTHING.


Decision Guidance


Happiness is everything. If you are not happy today, you have got to be doing something else today! Tomorrow may not show up.  Age is immaterial. Most people spend their lives as walking carcasses anyways. 


If the pursuit of happiness takes every minute of it of your life, let it. It's all there is to life. I am willing to trade my life off for my happiness and my dreams.  done. It is a non-negotiable. No compromises. If I die, I die. I would rather die on my feet than live on my knees

Writing 2011!

25 hours a week!
weekdays: 9-12 pm- 15 hours
weekends: 10 hours
Now, these 25 hours must be covered. Make time. Do or die.

Fear?!!

keep a clear heart and clean conscience. fears will met away

Being yourself

is a tough act. Sometimes you feel what the hell people are thinking and if they might get offended because you are having fun! Here is my take on the subject:

Don't apologize for being yourself, as long as you know that you intentions are clean

While you are drunk!

I am arriving at this important rule slowly. While you are drunk and not quite conscious, everything that you say is frivolous.

I am grateful...

for the company and proximity of people I love
for the love of my family
for a healthy mind and body
for the education that has taught me to think
for some great folks I call friends
for work that excites me
for a super set of people as colleagues
for a mind full of dreams
for a belief that I can achieve them
for times that made me stronger
for a spirit to never say die
for the attitude of an incorrigible optimist
for the past which had a reason
for the future I want to create
for the present that is present
for the uncertainty of it all
for a healthy dose of insanity
for every moment I breathe


for being alive!

Winter Mornings

Do you think that December is a sleepy month? No? 'Yawn!'

Well, I am, as a matter of habit, a morning person. I love the charm and beauty of mornings. They have been gorgeous invariably. The summers, the winters or the spring. But since the beginning of December, I have been waking up late. I don't know what happens. Now that today I am up on time, let me share the experience.

It's spooky! You get into the quilt at night and it is a different world. It's like it completely envelopes you and it is pretty tough to get out of the damn thing. Someone has been coming and switching off the alarm everyday. I don't know who. I don't do it. It's not me. No. Yes.

And if you wake up, I mean you are conscious but still lying flat in the bed, then your body is having an argument with your mind. The mind says, 'get up' and the body says 'boss, please a little while more.' You know? And then, the mind goes off for an errand and the body says 'yay yay,' off to sleep again!

Since the body is getting too naughty, i guess my mind will have to call in the super boss, 'the will' and issue strict instructions and punishments for non-compliance and that's looks like the only way to rein in the body :P

Well, good morning. Have a super day!

super thoughts of the day!

Blessed are those who recognize how blessed they are.

All the world's a game. It's just screwed up. change the rules.

Smile every second. You are alive!

The philosophy kicks in today. Life is a roller coaster that they have always said it is. There will be a high tide and there will be a low tide.

It will go on till the last breath in the body. The main important point is that it is all a part of the experience and we will only get our share of life.

Enjoy it. smile every second for one single reason that we are blessed with the gift of life.

Just one reason.

Raping the society!

I have a tendency to walk while I talk on mobile. One night, in my area, I was talking was taking a stroll and it suddenly got dark. The electricity connection conked out. I was enjoying the conversation with a friend and suddenly my phone was snatched out of my hands and I thought someone was playing a prank. By the time I got over the shock and realized that 2 guys on a bike had robbed the phone from me and ran after the bike, they disappeared into the dark.

I lost my phone. What happened later was many people in my neighborhood blamed me for having lost the phone!! They said why was I walking on the street? Why was I not conscious of it? Why did I not run after them since I am a runner?!!

Basically, they blamed me and I was the victim.

Women get raped and then, they are blamed for what happens to them. It's like saying that man is a beast who would jump at a woman the moment he sees skin!!! It's a shame on our collective conscience if there is one.

Have you thought what promotes recidivism? Why does it happen over a over? Why do a group of men have the gall to gang rape a woman and leave her for dead and malign all men all over?

It's because they think they will escape punishments or the punishments are just not harsh enough. Bury them alive, castrate them, whip out every shred of lives in their body. Stop those bastards.

Why do you smoke?

I know I may be asking for trouble but one's gotta say what one's gotta say!

"What we think, or what we know, or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do." Smoking is one example that comes to my mind to exemplify the quote.

While I was growing up as a kid, I would look at people who smoke and wonder what are they doing? I did not have answers then. I don't have any answers now either. Then I used to commute by a Haryana Roadways bus to my college to Delhi everyday and the driver would smoke his bidis right under the sign 'No Smoking.' I had many arguments with people who would sit next to me and take out a smoke the moment the bus would start. I did not think much of those people.

Another rationale I had for a long time was that the people who smoke are not good. They are bad. Vo Acche log nahi hote. Then I met many people who in their character and person are some of the best I have met and they would just flash a cigarette and romance with the smoke many times a day. That's where it got complicated.

Why do educated, smart, intelligent people smoke?

Potential Perceptive answers since perception is reality

1. It helps relieve stress. Stress is in the air.

2. Let's just have a smoke. I mean, what the hell!

3. It goes great with coffee/tea/Beer/Rum/whatever

4. It's a good filler to fill space and time when we have not got anything worthwhile to do

5. Smoking is sexy, romantic, enchanting, divine, sublime etc

Okay, fine. Well, it's none of my business that you smoke. It's yours. I generally manage to avoid passive smoking as well since I object. May be smoking is good and my mind has not reached the level where I can really decipher what kind of surreal pleasure or joy one can derive from it.

For you to consider if it helps you. If it makes your life better and serves as an example for your kids or people you would like to emulate you.

Think about it over a smoke.

Smile Anyway!

Work may overwhelm you at times

Smile Anyway

Results have a tendency to be uncertain

Smile Anyway

Things may not work out your way

Smile Anyway

In your pursuits, you will be rejected a many times

Smile Anyway

Your body will fall sick sometimes

Smile Anyway

People will behave irrationally many times

Smile Anyway

You may lose your job

Smile Anyway

You may lose who you love

Smile Anyway

Life will be unfair at times

Smile Anyway

Destiny will not offer no reasons for its actions

Smile Anyway

You may shout, scream, cry or fear

Nothing useful was ever achieved with tears

For if you smile when the chips are up or down

You will be an inspiration for people around

Remember, says Amar, no matter what happen may

Just! Just, Smile Anyway

bring back the discipline!

There is a certain amount of discipline that I think I need to bring back into my life. My life depends on it.

a few new rules:

1. reinforce daily exercise. i can't understand winter excuses!

2. Facebook! Not more than an hour during the day. I have got work to do which it infiltrates into. So, basically, that means the i will be logged in into FB for not more than an hour.

3. never use the stairs. life is pretty much sedentary any ways.

4. create a 2011 goal sheet this weekend.

The direction has been decided. Let's press the escalator.

Too early, To late!

It won't be too early. It might just be too late.

the thought factory

What you do and who you are

"If what you do becomes who you are, then who you are must drive what you do"

Amar

super thoughts of the day

don't love someone like a dog, you will end up astray like most dogs do.

don't take anything undeserved. don't give anything undeserved.

the thought factory

3 Commandments by Amar

I was thinking about it yesterday and I realized that whatever I do, I have 3 primary objectives in life:-

My 3 Commandments

1. Be yourself and do what you love

The source of happiness is love. wow! Everything I do should express who I am.

2. Live with an attitude of gratitude

The knowledge that I have been fortunate to enjoy a state of good health, loving parents and friends, good education, a thinking mind and the fact that I am alive is the reason to be happy. I will never run out of those but even if it comes to one, I shall be happy for I am alive!

3. Live Fearlessly

Fear is a mind and body killer. It paralyzes me whenever I am scared of anything. I hate to be scared- scared of anything- of losing my job, my loved ones, of dying, of anything. What's the worse that will happen? Someone will kill me? I mean, the worst thing to happen to anyone early on is the end of his/her life and as long as we are alive, everything is temporary.

Amen!

What Is love?

if some body's happiness gives you happiness, dude, you are in love :)

super thought of the day!

Life is the hardest school; as you will never know what class you are in, what exam you will have next. And, you can't cheat because no one else will get the same questions!!!

love it!

A comment from a friend

Thank a lot Amar! Such a typical psychologist! Luv it! :)

Be kind!

Personally, Socially or Professionally, we are dealing with people- people yearning for appreciation, love, pride, a feeling that somehow their existence matters! Not all of us wanted to be strong. Given a choice, we would have loved to keep our innocence.

Be kind.

Why me?

Lady Luck called me this evening and said that I am here to answer the age old question, 'why me?' This is what it told me:-

"I want to tell you that I have chosen your life to be different. Your life will not be any similar to those of normal people. Their roads may be smooth. Yours won't be. Their journeys may be comfortable, yours will be rocky. I am giving you a chance to be different and to be an example for your people.

Now, it's up to you. I have made my mind. You will anyways be an example for others. Either you would be an example of a man or a woman who rose above all circumstances to rise in life showing great determination and optimism for your blessings! You have an opportunity to be great.

Or otherwise, you can choose to give up. You will fritter away and no one will remember you. Or you can choose to stay sullen and sad. That won't help because whatever attitude you carry, you will spread it around. If you will spread unhappiness, no body will like you since no one likes to be unhappy.

My baby, I want you to be strong, resilient and powerful. You have the gift of life and I have given you many talents. You can create a wonderful life with the blessings I have given you. They shall be yours. You can either focus on what you have or on what you don't have. Do what you can with what you have. Work hard and be an example of the powerful the human spirit.

Don't let me down."

Lady Luck

Tears

When some people feel sad, they shed tears.

There have been times in my life when I experienced certain events and felt there was suddenly a burst of water in my eyes from I don't know where and I was crying! When I shed those tears, I made sure I was alone- and then, it burst! Hell, I won't want anyone to know that I cried. What nonsense! Although I think I am relatively stronger now, still, I can't guarantee if I will not shed any tears again. It's a sign of weakness, isn't? But then, isn't it also a part of being human? Whoever said that we are supposed to pretend to be invincible and thereby, not allow any of those awful face smudging droplets to stay where they come from!

Some people just cry more often than others. Especially women. You know they say, men don't cry. At least, not often. I get very uncomfortable when someone around me cries. I don't quite know what to say. I am never sure what's the most appropriate behavior. At the best, I can offer a hug and let the tsunami continue till it calms down.

We don't want to cry. We always want to smile and be happy, don't we? But, that's just not the nature of life. I think it's okay to shed those tears sometimes if it makes us feel better. Moderation is the key. Perhaps, it is something I will always be ambivalent about and be comfortable with the ambivalence.

P.S. Men do cry.

:P

Amar

Success Sutra

16 hours of practice. 4 hours of theory.

Everyday

When you want success as badly as you need air, you will get it.~~~~Socrates

"When you walk out of your doors...."

"When you walk out of your doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high, fill in the lungs to the utmost, drink in the sunshine, greet everyone you meet with a smile and put soul into every handclasp"

Morning prayer from one of my all time favorite books which perhaps hooked me to reading forever-'how to win friends and influence people' by Dale Carnegie

A happiness evangelist

I am a happiness evangelist. I evangelize happiness. I don't care if you are married or single, successful or struggling, rich or poor, religious or atheist, I do care if you are happy or not. It's all there is. It's the purpose of your life, my life, everything- only the definitions differ!

Happy Children's day

Sometimes I wonder why people stop celebrating their birthdays as they grow up. As usual, I ask them why did they stop celebrating? And they say, 'It's something for the kids. Grown ups don't do it'.

Well, if celebrations are for children, why grow up? "Growing old is inevitable. Growing up is optional." Hey, what do kids do? They whine, they complain, they plead, they beg but they want what they want. As we grow up someone thrusts words like 'mature,' 'compromise' and 'sacrifice' right into our minds by consistent repetition! We learn that we can't have our lives the way we want them. We must compromise and sacrifice our desires and wants. Why do us adults think that we are more superior to kids just because we have seen more years? Isn't a child supposed to be the purest form of nature, a form of God, if you will? There is so much to learn from them.

I love kids. They would just start talking to you, poor innocents! They would smile and play with you believing the world is a beautiful and safe place. They carry visions of the world which is idealistic and pristine.

Don't let the child within you die. When you want a hug, it's the child. When you yearn for something, it's the child. When you seek company and security, it's the child. When you want a reward for work well done, it's the child.

Hey, happy children's day.

After all, 'dil to bacha hai jee.'

on marriage!

We are not born to get married. it's just a choice, a choice in our journey to grow, to be more, to experience life at higher level. It can only happen if we get to marry someone who complements us and loves us at least as much as we love that person.

I love...

i love to think. i love to read. i love to write. i love public speaking. i love great people. i love to travel. i love music. i love advertising. i love to run. i love to take a stroll. i love to laugh. i love to create smiles. i love the man in the mirror.

do what you love.

Be kind!

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

Plato

wow. so true

super thought of the day! Stotd!

It is not easy to stop a man who knows clearly where he is going, and why. Amen!

The meeting this morning triggered this thought and it will take a lifetime of testing it.

totd!

Be great at what you

do.

super thought of the day

Everything we read, learn, the people we meet, those who stay and those who walk away leave indelible impressions on our lives and existence. We are not what we are today. We are the sum of all days we have lived and everything we have experienced.

ABC of Life

A- Avoid negative sources, things and people

B- Believe in yourself. Nobody else will.

C- Consider things from every angle. Create a good life.

D- Don't give up, ever.

E- Enjoy life today; yesterday is gone and tomorrow may not show up

F- Family and Friends are priceless treasures. Value them.

G- Give what you can. Glorify the human spirit.

H- Hang on to your dreams

I- Ignore those who try to discourage you. Imagine great things.

J- Just do it baby

K- Keep on trying no matter how hard it seems. The tunnel will come to an end.

L- Love yourself I say. The man who cannot love himself cannot love anyone.

M-Meditate daily. Make it happen.

N- Never cheat or steal. Always go for a win-win.

O- Open your eyes and see things as they are. Facts don't cease to exist just because they are ignored.

P- Practice makes a man near perfect. Praise performance well done.

Q- Quitters never win. Never Never Never, Never quit. Question EVERYTHING.

R- Reading is to mind what running is to body. Don't miss either.

S- Stop procrastinating. Later may never come.

T-Take control of your destiny. It bends to a power called WILL.

U- Understand yourself and be yourself. It's one definition of success.

V- Value life. The fact that we are alive to read this, is a blessing. I know many who aren't.

X- Xcellence in what we do makes us who we are. Never settle.

Y- You are unique, unprecedented. Comparing yourself with someone else is an insult to your existence

Z- Zestfully pursue happiness. HAPPINESS IS EVERYTHING.

Diwali

Please pardon me if I happen to be the only person who finds this entire "may this Diwali bring you happiness, prosperity and whatever' a bit vacuous.

Most of the celebrations in India have religious undertones and since God makes no sense to me anymore, the celebrations don't make sense either. I mean, for example, they worship Goddess Lakshmi, the one supposed to be associated with wealth. I have not even heard a mythological story related to Goddess Lakhmi like those for Lord Rama and Krishna who happen to take the credit for Ramayana and Mahabharata.

Anyways, like all other days, I will do something I like and find an excuse to hug people and meet them. yea, that perhaps makes sense.

Food for thought!

Maybe we're not supposed to be happy. Maybe gratitude has nothing to do with joy. Maybe being grateful means recognizing what you have for what it is. Appreciating small victories. Admiring the struggle it takes simply to be human. Maybe we're thankful for the familiar things we know. And maybe we're thankful for the things we'll never know. At the end of the day, the fact that we have the courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate.

-- Grey's Anatomy

Couplet of the day

jab hame zamane ke kanoon raas nahi aaye

ae amar

ham un raaston par chale jo hamne khud banaye

Couplet of the day

dekhen to insaan hansta khelta nazar aata hai,

pardon ke peeche kache hai yaar hamare;

dil ke taar na chhed ae amar,

bas aansu thame baithe hai sare

"Do what you love." That's it. Stay hungry. Stay foolish.

"If you live each day as it was your last, some day you will most certainly be right. Almost everything- all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure- these things just fall away in the face of death- leaving only what's truly important.

Most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

I was lucky. I found what I loved to do early in life. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. You have got to find what you love and that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is gonna fill a large part of your life and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work and the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it and like any great relationship, it gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking. Don't settle.” Steve Jobs

I have got it down to 4 words:

“Do what you love.”

Seek out an occupation that gives you a sense of meaning, direction and satisfaction in life. Having a sense of purpose and striving towards goals gives life meaning, direction and satisfaction. It not only contributes to health and longevity, but also makes you feel better in difficult times. Do you jump out of bed on Monday mornings and look forward to the work week? If the answer is ‘no’ keep looking, you’ll know when you find it.

(would could should may might) have!! are dead

would have

could have

should have

may have

might have

are dead. let them stay dead.

lets focus on I can and, I will

Be what you wanna be!

If we are what we do, the vice versa must also be true.

what we do must be who we are.

Before you are known as one, start behaving as one

An advertising veteran :)

A bestselling writer

One of the finest Public Speakers on the Planet

good morning.

Intimacy

You don't understand anything about anyone in a group. it happens eye to eye, one to one

Amar's PPS- Power Packed Songs

Well, these are some songs I have been humming over so many years. They were and continue to be my favorites.

My 10 PPS:

1. Mai zindagi kaa saath nibhata chala gaya......Dev Anand

2. Kisi ki muskurahaton pe ho nisar....Raj kapoor

3. Zindagi ik safar hai suhana....Rajesh Khanna

4. Dum maro dum....Zeenat aman

5. Aane wala pal.....from Golmal

6. Rock on- the movie Rock on

7. Tere bin jeena nahin....bali brahambhatt

8. Tere bin sahnu sohnya...rabbi shergill

9. Aashayen...the movie Iqbal

10. Kal ho na ho....the movie kal ho na ho

rock on!

Women

"A woman is an emblem of beauty; an enigma that harbors a myriad thoughts and emotions within the crucible of privacy. She drives you crazy, and yet one cannot fathom how insipid the world would be without her. "

"It upsets a woman to be or not to be, stared at hungrily!" ;)

Women are nature's finest creations. If they want to be like men and come down to our level, fine.

Comparisons!

No matter what you do, you will get your share of life. Even identical twins have extremely contrasting life stories. and even then, they compare, such a waste!!! enjoy your story.

Couplet of the day- shayar e amar :)

Kabhi narazgi, phir yaari

Kabhi khushi, phir dard ki baari

chalti aayi hai, chalti rehegi

ae amar ye dillagi

aur bata kya kahen

tujhse pyar bahut hai zindagi :)

Couplet of the day

Koi jaata hai koi aata hai,

kisi ke jaane se

chalti rehti hai,

rukti nahi ye duniya ae amar

bas kuch log chale jaane pe

yaad aane ki ada rakhte hain

Take a break!

The Purpose of a break

Sometimes we need to stop the engine of life to answer 3 questions:

"What has happened?

What is happening?

What needs to happen?"

My folks!

jo dil ko acha lage, zehen usi ka sajda karta hai,
aye khuda, hame teri zarurat nahi, hame apno me khuda dikhta hai

"Selfish and Proud of it"

For the rest of my life, I will devote at least 2 hours to writing every day. That could mean:

10pm -0000 hours
0400-0600 hours

whatever! no matter what! come what may! I must succeed at it! It's my only chance to live the way I want to! I don't have a choice.

Andaz!

Kyun apni tarah jeene ka andaz chhod den
Aur kya hai hamare pas andaz ke siva


vah vah vah!

totd!

If you can't laugh at your own life, you just haven't got the joke!

Solitude

If you're lonely when you're alone, then you are in bad company!


by someone. wow!

Conscience

Conscience is a prickly thing. Most people avoid prickles.

thoughts of the day

ye chhoti si zindagi mere yar
yad rakhna, keh gaye the shayar amar
jahan bhi ja, baant pyar
ye chhoti si zindgi mere yar

A lot can be known about a man by observing how he treats those less privileged than him

My stance on Marriage!

Once for all, the point is not what is the right age to get married or become a papa or a mummy! i don't care. the point is if we have found someone we don't want to live without. till then, there are enough books to live with...


if it happens in a year, good. If it does not happen ever, so be it.

totd

kishti hamari jab bhi dagmagayi,
hamne kishti ka rukh mod diya;
are jao kehdo toooofano ne,
hamne unse darna chhod diya

The Selfish Atheist!

Life is going to be interesting from here on. Every day almost I get into a discussion with someone on one of these subjects.

It's not popular to be an atheist.

It's not popular to be selfish.

I am both. A selfish atheist.

ha ha! And proud of it! Good luck dude.

Success is happiness!

"My definition of success is to live your life in a way that causes you to feel tons of pleasure and very little pain"

Anthony Robbins

How do we evaluate the quality of your life? How do we know you are successful or not? What is success?

The other day I woke up thinking about these things. It was a beautiful morning like all early mornings at 5-6 am.

Success for a human being, in my opinion is, his/her HAP- Happiness and Pleasure

The opposite is SAP- Suffering and Pain

Coincidentally, HAP happens to be the first 3 words of the word Happy. And SAP happens to be a verb which means 'to drain energy and vitality!"

Let's not focus on the negative. Lets focus on HAP.

What the heck! I wish I had known this earlier. If I had, life would have been different and I would have taken different decisions. You know, there is a trap many of us get entangled in. It's called the trap of "would have should have could have might have."

Rule number 1: Success is happiness. Amen!

If you are happy, you are successful. If you are not happy, go to rule number 1.

Amar on Selfishness!

"My Philosophy, in essence, is the concept of man as a heroic being, with his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with productive achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only absolute."
My idol in writing and life-Ayn Rand

Have you ever heard someone saying to you, "Oh, that's so selfish!" and how did you feel at that comment? Guilty? Guilty of being selfish? Did you say to yourself. "Oh my God, how could I be so selfish," and feel disgusted with yourself?

Let me present an alternate view.

It is good to be selfish. In fact, it is the only way to live life. Saying that what you do, you do for someone else is hypocrisy and sacrificing your own interest causing yourself pain is cowardice.

I wonder what do so many of these God-men mean when they say that selflessness is the key to happiness and a fulfilling life. Hey, who are we fooling?

A couple decides to become parents when they really WANT children. They are doing it for themselves. They want children. They want to raise them and enjoy the pleasure of doing so. They are not doing it for the kids. Of course we love our parents since we exist and become whatever we become because of their love and care. We owe immense love and gratitude to them. But telling your children that whatever you did for them was a favor is wrong. You did it for yourself- for your happiness.

No company is obliging any employee. Companies need productive and useful people. If a company hires an employee, it is doing it for itself. So, next time your boss tell you that the company did this and that for you, you know that they need you and they are not doing you a favor or making a sacrifice! They do it for themselves.

We want to be with people we love. One of the greatest institutions in the world is marriage. There is a bizarre institution called an arranged marriage. 2 people who don't know each other sometimes even at a bare comfort level get into marriage- TO PLEASE THEIR PARENTS. All of these people who say that they married for their parents and sulk for the rest of their lives are cowards. They did it for the holy and sublime principle of SELFLESSNESS because it is a sin to be selfish and demand that we will only marry someone we like and who likes us!!!

So many of us in our society are in jobs and careers we don't like a bit. How did we reach where we are? Someone told you when you were young and naive, "Son, I want you to be doctor/engineer/Pilot/MBA/Lawyer..." You forgot that you enjoyed writing/painting/singing/sports/traveling... and decided to be guided by the compass someone else set for you. You never really found the time to explore who you really are and by the time yo realized, it was too late and had translated into could haves/should haves/would haves/might haves.... After all, all that you were trying to walk on is the heavenly principle of selflessness and sacrifice and somewhere you lost yourselves.

I wish, oh how I wish, people had understood Ayn Rand when she wrote the Fountainhead, The Atlas Shrugged or the Virtue of Selfishness. The world would have been a better place.

No, don't tell me about exceptions. Don't tell me that you could shoot and kill people if that made you happy. That's bizarre and abnormal.I am talking about a commoner who is just trying his best to juggle up life and balance the demands of others with the demands his soul places on him.

So here I am telling you to be selfish. Who will take care of you if you don't? Who will think about your happiness? You are the only one who can do it. You are the only one who is responsible.

Love people because YOU WANT to love them not because you are doing it for them. Be honest to your work because YOU WANT to do your best not because you are doing your company a favor. Do it for yourselves and for a change, feel good about it.

Be selfish I say....and don't be guilty about it. Be proud.

Beautiful thoughts!

Men of genius do not excel in any profession because they labor in it, but they labor in it because they excel.-- William Hazlitt

It's better to crawl in the right direction than run on the wrong

Yesterdays and Tomorrows

"Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or to lose."

- Lyndon B. Johnson

happiness

the happiness that you feel is the only barometer of life. Success is overrated. If you don't feel happy, take a U turn to the crossroad and if you must-start again on a new journey with your personal happiness the only fundamental and objective of life.

Fresh from my thought factory!

Why do things happen they way they do?

i guess i survived, yet again! No one has, no one will overpower the winds of destiny. What happened in your life was supposed to happen. It's a part of your life story. Your story is yours and it compares to none else.

One of the quotes I love is 'Only dead fish flow with the flow.' I like to believe that man creates his own destiny and life. The last few months have taught me that well, not quite. Man has a limited mandate. Our control, as far as I see is limited to two things:

Thoughts
Actions

Thoughts are things, so my card says. Whatever decisions we take, are right. Think about it. Have you ever taken a decision which intends to cause you pain, sadness, displeasure- deliberately? NO. You don't. We want our decisions to give us happiness, pleasure, fun, excitement and take our lives to a higher level. The decisions we take are right at the point they are taken. So, as far as sanity is concerned, ALL DECISIONS ARE RIGHT. Only lunatics take decisions that cause pain. We have a certain level of knowledge and experience and with that we take decisions that are intended to uplift our lives.

However, sometimes, they don't. Bizarre things happen and your decisions turn out to be wrong. Did you intend it at the time you made that decision? Of course not. Hindsight is always right. With what you learnt as a results of consequences, you will feel that it should have been obvious to you! Forgive yourself. If you could have, you would have.

We don't control results and consequences completely. We have limited control over them to the extent of directing our thoughts and actions with the power of our will! What happens is what is supposed to happen. HISTORY IS THE VICTOR'S ACCOUNT OF WHAT HAPPENED. Don't believe everything you hear.

Lets tickle the grey cells. Why did Helen Keller lose her eyesight and hearing at 19 months? Why was Nick Vujicic born without limbs? What did Nelson Mandela do to deserve to spend over 27 years in prison? Why did Lance Armstrong contract cancer in his 20s? Why do innocent people lose their lives in terrorist attacks? Why are people born to destitute poverty and helplessness? Some of these people like the ones I have quoted emerge and succeed. Many don't.

Things happen. There are so many questions which have no answers.

Sometimes you will do your best and fail. Sometimes, someone you loved a lot will leave you without reasons and explanation. Sometimes, bad things do happen to good people. As Steve job says, sometimes, life will hit you with a brick- without explanation! Yes, it's not fair. Whatever!

What's the worst that will happen? You will keep fighting till the last breath in your lungs. You will die. It's better than giving up without a fight. We fight since we are not willing to acknowledge defeat. NO. Give up or fight like hell (lance Armstrong)

The world moves on, without you. No one is indispensable here. You are relevant as long as you can prove it. The world will leave you for dead if you don't keep reminding it that you exist. The world has evolved and lives on the Darwinian Principle namely- LET THE STRONGEST LIVE AND THE WEAKEST DIE.

I am sure the greatest inspiration of my life- Helen Keller- understood this.

Do your work. Never give up. The purpose of life is purposeful motion. To do the best we can and keep improving our best with what we learn. Let results and consequences take care of themselves since they will, anyways.

Amar

totd

Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.

Forgive yourself! Let's restart life all over again from step one....

I am too hard on myself. It's tough for me sometimes to forgive my own mistakes. When things go wrong like they did 6 months back, I tend to look back and berate myself! Why did I do that? Why did I take that decision? Why did I not accept the google offer in 2005? Why did I go for MBA? Why did I not try in advertising after graduation? Hell, why did I not study advertising in graduation to start with, there were no tests then...everyone was after Bcom and economics?! Why did I not apply to advertising companies from the campus, just because they said that the salaries will be low?!!!!

now, the answer to all these questions is....

I was a different person then. I was not wise enough to know what I know now. I know all this because of the mistakes that I made and the pain that I have gone through and going through! I was a different person yesterday. And.....if I could have done better, I would have done better, i have, after all, always wanted happiness for myself and my people....

So, I forgive myself. This was all predetermined, part of my destiny, my growing process if I am supposed to survive. If I am not supposed to survive, I will not.

So, I forgive myself. I can say with 100% confidence that I have always tried to be the best I can be. And I promise this for future as well.

Let's hit again, as hard as possible, leaving the results to destiny. . Let's restart life!

thoughts to live by

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” Theodre Roosevelt!

“The only man who makes no mistakes is the man who never does anything.”

“Always do what you are afraid to do.”

“Life is the art of drawing without an eraser.” wow!- John W Gardner

Self-pity is easily the most destructive of the nonpharmaceutical narcotics; it is addictive, gives momentary pleasure and separates the victim from reality.”

Thoughts I live by!

We will find a way or make one-----Hannibal

All paid jobs absorb and degrade the mind. Aristotle

“Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence” Aristotle

Okay, I have failed to find a way in 6 months. Let's try making one now.

Musings over destiny!

There is something called as Destiny. Individual Destiny. Your destiny determines your life, my destiny determines mine. Destiny is a predetermined set of events and happenings. Results are predetermined. NO matter what you do, what is destined to happen to you will eventually come to pass. Now, what does that mean in terms of a man's free will? Why am I up at 5 in the morning to start my day?

This means that man's role in this world is limited to his thoughts and actions. Man must exercise conscious volitional control over his thoughts and actions and that way he can negotiate with destiny to allow him positive and uplifting outcomes. Will destiny oblige or not depends on destiny. WE CAN ONLY NEGOTIATE WITH DESTINY WITH OUR THOUGHTS AND ACTION AND NOT BY STANDING IN FRONT OF AN IMAGINARY FICTIONAL CREATURE CALLED GOD. SO GOD IS OUT OF MY PICTURE. Man must do what he can do with everything he got to create his desired and intended outcomes. He must want his results and be committed to them and also know that results will only occur when they are destined to and if they are destined to. Oliver Tambo died just a few days before South Africa got freedom. He spent his entire life in the pursuit of this dream.

Many times destiny is not fair. I just cannot see why Helen Keller deserved to live in a dark and silent world! I cannot see why a loving and forgiving man like Nelson Mandela deserved to spend over 27 years in jail. I cannot see why Nick Vujicic was born without limbs?!! I cannot see why Malayesh and Gaurav had to die in the terrorist attack? I cannot even see why some people are born to riches and others lead a life destitute poverty!!

The answer is it's their individual destiny. But again, as people who have grown from rags to riches and the 3 inspirations I mentioned above, you can negotiate with destiny ARMED WITH DISCIPLINED THOUGHT AND ACTION. Don't go to God. There is none.

Good luck! Let's hope destiny/lady luck is nice to you.

THINK POSITIVE, UPLIFTING THOUGHTS AND TAKE POSITIVE AND UPLIFTING ACTION. RESULTS ARE PREDETERMINED BY DESTINY. So don't get worked up. It's useless and wasteful to get stressed. Just keep working and expect the results you want. Work extremely hard and don't let a single negative thought enter your mind. Negative thoughts corrupt the mind and thereby corrupting the body.

What controls the mind? WILL POWER
What Controls the body? The MIND
What controls the results? DESTINY

Michael Jordan

"Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn around and
give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it."

- Michael Jordan

Amar's Top 10 Wisdom Picks!

This morning, I thought of choosing 10 thoughts to live by. I have done a lot of reading and some thinking by myself as well by now. I have read thoughts and ruminations of some of the best minds of the world and been through personal learning experiences. Here are my top 10 thoughts to live by:-

1. That I am alive today is a gift, a minimum reason to smile.
2. Whatever happens, happens for good. The dots will somehow connect in the future. Believe in yourself.
3. Never bow your head, always hold it high, look the world in the eye.
4. Only dead fish flow with the flow
5. A ship is safe at the harbor but that's not what ships are built for. The purpose of life is purposeful motion.
6. Do what you love. Your dreams are your real job.
7. The mirror question: If today were my last day on earth, would I want to do what I am about to do today?
8. Reading is to mind what running is to body. Never miss either.
9. What we think, or what we know, or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do.
10. Failure is giving up. Never give up. Never never never give up.


**subject to revision

Do something!

Do what you love
Do what you can
No matter what you do
Always be doing something!
Try this Try that
Keep what works
Discard what does not
Do something.

When you are in bed, you are dead! The only consequence is what you do! If you must, fail a billion times. The only failure is in giving up.

Rules of Destiny!

You see, I am one of those guys who, in general, would hate admitting that my life is being determined not by my actions but by something else. But over the last few months, I have had to think about destiny a lot.

What percentage of my life is determined by destiny? The answer is almost 100% since the beginning of 2010. You know!!!! 100%. I have done everything possible within my power to find a job that challenges my spirit. Now, I am an extremely hard working guy, talented, energetic, educated. Zero Results.

Now, why is a question in a fair world. What determined the fate of my two seniors and extremely fine gentlemen Malayesh and Gaurav? Why did they have to die the way they did? Any answers? You see, there is a power at work and we don't understand it. Everything happens for a good reason? ya? Try giving me a reason for this.

okay, I have mistakes in life. I have. But nothing convinces me that they amount to the results I have now. It's excruciating! why?! why did the project fail? Why did I have to work with a cunt like Kenneth? why did i lose that disgusting job?

For that matter, why did I make the mistakes that I did? By the way, why am I alive right now?!!! I can't say for sure that I deserve it! Why do people who loved me when I was doing well have disappeared now? I mean, why do things happen the way they do?

The pictures of Malayesh and Gaurav will always remind me that:

1. There are things about this world that we will never be able to explain. Destiny determines it. There are things which we cannot control. It isn't a fair world.

2. I am still alive and this day that I have got is another opportunity to make something of my life and give something to the world before something hits me fatally! No matter how hard it gets, I must keep going and never never never, never give up.

I hope the two of them are safe and in peace wherever they have gone. By the way, where have they gone? Why are these questions not answered?

i will stop myself here.

staying alive! if i die tonight....

here, for anybody who cares!

in the last few months, after having finished my book, I guess the only thing that's kept me going is that I am alive and my persistent, compulsive optimism that staying alive is a gift!

It's not been a lot of fun being alive though but I guess this shall pass. A lot has passed and I survived. This shall pass too. Let's see. If something were to happen to stop my journey, it's okay too.

I have seen a lot of beautiful things about life already. Some moments were worth the whole life :), like

Falling in love
Scoring a first class in undergrad
holding her hand, the first kiss
Being the best performer at work many times over
getting an MBA from a top B school after 5 years of struggle
Organizing events, leadership forum, winning the name ball :)
Traveling to Singapore, Dubai and Batam Indonesia, some beautiful places in India
Every time I got to address an audience
Getting to share my poems and dedicating them to many faculty at campus
Writing my first book and having it read by many people who liked something or the other
Sitting on a rickshaw to riding a bicycle to school to riding my bike, driving my car
Making friends and spending time with them
Dating
Surviving adversity, over and over
Almost 3 decades with my parents
Teaching public speaking
Blogging
Reading great literature
My small library
Running and feeling the rush in my body
Rising up in the morning and feeling the grass
Being a rebel many times over
Being a proud atheist and apostle of selfish happiness
Just being myself in my own way!

It's been a good life, even if I die tonight! thanks the almighty powers for allowing me the wonderful days. I have been a nice guy if not a great guy, a man I respect and admire, someone who dares to stand for what he believes in.

I have had my faults and fallibility's. I have never been perfect and made many mistakes. But I never deliberately did anything to bring pain to another human being.

I have been faithful in love and did everything I could to be loving and caring. I have not been the best son and brother, perhaps.

If I die tonight, I will die a proud man. But the world would have lost someone very valuable who could make tremendous positive difference to it. ha ha

this was fun! and i meant it the whole of it :)

July 2010!

alright, it's July and I have had enough of this job search! I have also been screwing up my health lately. So, the rules from now on:-

1. Basic schedule must get followed (it means having left the bed by 0500-0530 and back to bed by 2300/2330). Whatever job search ends at noon everyday! Talk to yourself like a winner. Neuro Linguistic Programming is always at work.
2. I must not miss exercise for a single day
3. Start working on ELS and find any more possible alternates if you can....
4. Finish writing AO and MOL by end of this month. Write day and night!
5. I will write Selfish and proud of it by year end
6. Since thoughts are things, do not entertain any negative thinking. You cannot afford the luxury of a negative thought. Not even one. slap yourself hard the moment you allow a negative thought in the mind.
7. Read at most 2 books a month. I have read most of the great success/business literature already. It's time for action. This month- keller and morita!
8.TRY A LOT OF STUFF AND KEEP WHAT WORKS. DISCARD WHAT DOES NOT IMMEDIATELY.

okay, that's about it. live strong and even if it comes to it soon, die strong.

why?!

why is a question in a fair world! that's why in the world we live, most often, it's not answered.

What did I do to deserve this?

is a useless question. The answer is the same as it is to why Nelson Mandela had to spend over 27 years in prison or lance Armstrong contracted cancer or why Helen Keller lost her vision and hearing at 19 months of age and live almost 86 years in silence and darkness!!!!! or why malayesh and gaurav lost their lives in a terrorist attack!!!

so you see, it's a useless question. There are no answers. But the lesson to take from the people who got to live is that they converted their negatives into positives, they made a lemonade of the lemon!

Helen Keller devoted her life to literature, which was something she could do!
Lance Armstrong survived cancer and won the Tour De France twice or more...
Nelson Mandela survived over 27 years in prison and saw his country emerge free and led it!
Nick Vujicic delivers talks around the world on hope, with no limbs.